Carolyn Hax: Fiancee is on a collision course with his reactionary parents

They have already mentioned how they want her to quit her job when we have children. She calmly responds that the decision will be made by her and me, but I know she’s reeling inside. These aren’t minor disagreements; they are life choices, and I know it’s going to lead to big problems in the future. She’ll play their game to a point. For example, after getting berated by my mother for helping me carry bulk groceries (“because that’s a man’s job”), she has never lifted more than what goes on the dinner table. I’ve spoken with them about how it is disrespectful and devaluing to both of us, but I don’t know what else I can do.

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